All of us have at least one story where someone treated us wrongly or unfairly or told us lies. The same is true of our conduct towards others. There are extreme cases of rape, abuse, deception, reproach or betrayal. Then there are ‘smaller’ misconducts against us like being stood up, mocked, ignored or lied to. We are all confronted with the emotions such conduct sparks in our hearts. When we just ignore or cut off from our lives those inflicting such pain, we will never find healing. Healing only comes when we truly forgive and let go of the pain we feel from the deed done against us, and also find forgiveness for the pain we have caused others.
A Kingdom principle
There is no more frightening Scripture in the Bible on this subject than Matthew 6:14-15 – “For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”
Regardless of how hard it might seem, our freedom within lies in our willingness to forgive others, so our Father’s forgiveness will also rest on us. This is one of the most wonderful, yet mysterious principles of the Kingdom of God!
Forgiveness, together with grace, is what makes the gospel of Jesus Christ different from any other religion. In 2 Corinthians 5:19-20 the Lord gives each believer the ministry of reconciliation, which includes the ministry of forgiveness. It is often not easy to forgive, but it is not impossible.
Practical guidelines when you need to forgive
- As Jesus forgave our sins, we also have to do the same for others. Luke 23:34a – “Then Jesus said, ‘Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do.'”
- Corrie ten Boom said, “Forgiveness is not an emotion. To forgive is an act of the will and a person’s will can act regardless of the temperature of the heart.” To forgive is first of all a choice. It helps to remember that Jesus forgave us a lifetime of sin.
- Forgiveness is a command of God: Up to seventy-seven times per day. In ourselves we do not have the strength or willingness to forgive. It is the Holy Spirit that helps us to forgive, even what seems impossible to forgive.
- Unforgiveness and bitterness are often rooted in undealt emotional pain from the past. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you deal with every form of pain (rejection, contempt, humiliation, injustice, etc.) from your past. Forgiveness is the first step to deliverance and healing from bitterness and emotional pain.
Turn to the Word for help
Scripture is filled with wonderful verses that will help you spot unforgiveness towards others in your own heart. It will also help you to know when you have hurt or offended others by what you did or said.
Asking for forgiveness is as important as forgiving someone who has wronged you. Following are some Scripture verses you can pray through as you seek to obey your heavenly Father.
Scriptures to pray when you need to forgive
- Do not hate your brother in your heart. Rebuke your neighbor frankly, so you will not share in his guilt. (Leviticus 19:17).
- You are forgiving and good, O Lord, abounding in love to all who call to you. (Psalm 86:5).
- If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink. (Proverbs 25:21).
- I, even I, am he who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more. (Isaiah 43:25).
- Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy. (Matthew 5:7).
- You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth. But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also.’ (Matthew 5:38- 9).
- You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy. But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.’ (Matthew 5:43-44).
- Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors… For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. (Matthew 6:12; 14-15).
- Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.” (Matthew 18:21-22).
- And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins. (Mark 11:25).
- But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful. (Luke 6:35-37).
- Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” And they divided up his clothes by casting lots. (Luke 23:34).
- Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. (Romans 12:14, 21).
- Love is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. (1 Corinthians 13:5-7).
- Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. (Ephesians 4:31-32).
- Make every effort to live in peace with all men and to be holy; without holiness, no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many. (Hebrews 12:14-15).
- Because judgment without mercy will be shown to anyone who has not been merciful. Mercy triumphs over judgment! (James 2:13).
- Anyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life in him. (1 John 3:15).
- If anyone says, “I love God,” yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen. (1 John 4:20)
Scriptures to pray when you need forgiveness
- And he passed in front of Moses, proclaiming, “The LORD, the LORD, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands, and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin. Yet he does not leave the guilty unpunished; he punishes the children and their children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation.” (Exodus 34:6-7).
- Then David said to Nathan, “I have sinned against the LORD.” Nathan replied, “The LORD has taken away your sin. You are not going to die.” (2 Samuel 12:13).
- If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land. (2 Chronicles 7:14).
- Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted. (Psalm 25:16).
- Blessed is he whose transgressions are forgiven, whose sins are covered. Blessed is the man whose sin the LORD does not count against him and in whose spirit is no deceit. (Psalm 32:1-2).
- Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight, so that you are proved right when you speak and justified when you judge. Hide your face from my sins and blot out all my iniquity. (Psalm 51:4, 9).
- He who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases. (Psalm 103:3).
- He does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us. (Psalm 103:10-12).
- Out of the depths I cry to you, O LORD; O Lord, hear my voice. Let your ears be attentive to my cry for mercy. If you, O LORD, kept a record of sins, O Lord, who could stand? But with you there is forgiveness; therefore you are feared. (Psalm 130:1-4).
- He who conceals his sins does not prosper, but whoever confesses and renounces them finds mercy. (Proverbs 28:13).
- “Come now, let us reason together,” says the LORD. “Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool.” (Isaiah 1:18).
- Surely, it was for my benefit that I suffered such anguish. In your love you kept me from the pit of destruction; you have put all my sins behind your back. (Isaiah 38:17).
- You will again have compassion on us; you will tread our sins underfoot and hurl all our iniquities into the depths of the sea. (Micah 7:19).
- Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you; leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift. (Matthew 5:23-24).
- Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. (Romans 8:1).
- Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. (Romans 8:33).
- Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? …And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God. (1 Corinthians 6:9-11).
- God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting men’s sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. (2 Corinthians 5:19).
- In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace. (Ephesians 1:7).
- If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. (1 John 1:9).
- My dear children, I write this to you so that you will not sin. But if anybody does sin, we have one who speaks to the Father in our defense—Jesus Christ, the Righteous One. He is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only for ours but also for the sins of the whole world. (1 John 2:1-2).
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